health, relationships

Driving While Under The Influenza

HO-lee-SHIT!

Apparently, the sickness that attacked during my last Wedding shoot was only ACT I. That was merely a prelude, the opening gig, the goddamned trailer. What followed last Wednesday was a sore throat and then … Thursday arrived with the full-blown flu. let me assure you – you DO NOT want this creature! i have never BEEN so sick. i woke up today feeling like lukewarm death, the 5-day monstrous headache persists, but is not as angry.

And the headache is due to the extreme dehydration and . . .

The sinuses – no amount of blowing or spraying or heat or cold or Vick’s or mint or menthol or hot sauce or weeping into the pillow or any other form of action short of drilling a small hole into my face has really worked. Perhaps we call it an infection now. Dunno. Fucking doctor is out ’til Thursday. She has it too.

The throat – small, but contained fire being constantly inflamed by the sinus drainage. Gingerale, while good for the belly acts a bit like gasoline in its carbonation, so best to let it go flat before drinking.

The ears, tongue – can’t hear can’t taste. Most of it tastes ‘wet’ and either ‘hot’ or ‘cold’ or ‘squishy’ or a combination thereof. my voice and all surrounding noises have been echoing out of the theatre that is my cranium for 5 days now. it is a concert of racket i never desire to attend again.

Then there’s the dry, hacking cough, the nausea, vomiting, EXTREME fatigue, and the complete non-desire to drink anymore Gatorade or water or eat popsicles for fear of technicolor vomit, though i desperately need the fluids.

Spring is arriving late this year, and so apparently, is the Flu season. And this one is what we call a “mother fucker.” That’s the technical term.

“Last time i had the flu, i was pissed,” Brooks said to me as he patted my head and brought me tomato soup. That about summed it up. Helpless, weary, sick, and pissed off.

“Honey, i either need soup, or a shotgun,” i whined. “Well – we have both here.” he mused. How very practical.

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In other, slightly more useful news . . . i am getting a new car. It is not really the time for me to attempt to afford a new car, but it is in fact, only new to me. i currently drive a Mercedes 300D Turbo Diesel. Made in 1983, Metallic Blue. The car i am getting is a 1985, same make and model but better transmission, and i know that the mechanic (my father-in-law) has had his hands on it for most of its life and a good $10,000 worth of work into restoring it. New paint included. Which brings me to its color. A pretty Champagne metallic. The guy just wants to downsize his fleet of cars for tax purposes, he bought an BMW and has another Mercedes. This was his occasional car for himself and his kids if they needed to go somewhere. The grocery getter, if you will.

It is merely a great opportunity to get the same car, in better condition, in the event that say, my transmission goes (which is soft & sloppy right now and may go when it feels like it) – it would cost about as much as $3000 to fix it and this is what i am paying for the whole car. As it is, my current car sports a few minor irritations: vaccuum switch leaks in the door locks, clear kote and paint are kinda tired, probably need new tires again soon, and whatever major next fix it will require.

i wasn’t really ready to retire this car, and will probably sell it waaaaay cheap for someone who wants a project car – to do a bio-diesel conversion to it for a little over $1000. i mean, 384,000 miles and it still runs fine, but mileage is no way to gauge these cars. it still has the sticker on it from a trip to Disney World, when Brooks and his friend Dave, (now an Annapolis policeman and soon to be married) drove it down for Spring Break). Dave used to drive it and it had a slow oil leak that turned catastrophic – he blew the engine and i watched as a new one was rebuilt and put back in, fired back into life and there was my new car at the time to replace a dead Ford Escort 🙄 A mighty improvement.

And here . . . yet another.

Champagne toasts everyone. But i need the Vitamin C – so make mine a mimosa!