writing

i am

I am
a monstrous and lithe energy
just barely contained
in this luminous soft-candy shell.
right handed and dual-brained
hard on the heart
and easy on the eyes.

I am
always hungry
often cold
but a lover of sleep
which soothes both.

I am
moving towards daydreams
that are intensely private
but talk too much in my writing
and laugh too loudly
and give me away.

I am
singing my own song
painting my own image
writing my own story
photographing my own vision
and the whole of the work
fills my entire body with its art
and resonates with purpose in my mind.

I am
sometimes cruel
particularly judgemental
and that is my protection.
still – i am
capable of profound love
and understanding and gentility
and that is my gift.

I am
the ace at seeing good
or at least morbid humor
in the worst possible things.

I am
not afraid of much
except losing someone slowly.

I am
terribly sarcastic
unwilling to accept “no”
impossibly stubborn
frustrated by time
and this means
I can do anything
once i learn how to carve the hours out
and forgive myself and others
for the occasional loss of ambition.

I am
constantly improving
by ups and downs
and always looking
for a new way to love
everyone i know
and especially
those i don’t,
because, through love
i am.

~ Andrea E. Janda